I lost my way.
Found it, then lost it again.
My voice, my confidence – the surety of who and what I am.
My guidance system. Inner Being. Divine Compass. I lost it. Found myself stuck in a gray mass, gasping for clarity. Praying for relief from my own self accusing spirit. Paralyzed by the fear of unfulfilled potential. Limited. Frustrated. Scared.
I know what it feels like to be alone. Not to spend a day alone but to truly be alone. In the midst of chaos it’s the worst thing in the world. For the expansion of the soul it is a necessary path.
The louder the chorus of the world, the more difficult it becomes to hear one’s self.
I found my way. In heartache, pain, confusion and stress. In the dark, I found my way. Heard a voice deeper than the core of the earth speak through me. “Don’t fight, don’t struggle, don’t try, don’t ask for help. Just BE.”
Just Be. That’s all you got, Universe – Just Be? What does that even mean? I’m struggling to keep my head in the game and that’s all you’ve got for me – just Be?
Yes, Just Be. You are already enough. You have nothing to prove. You are worthy of the Kingdom of God, just as you are. It is only your mindset that needs adjustment. You cannot claim abundance with an ungrateful heart. You weaken the connection to your power source when in submission to fear. There is boundless treasure awaiting you. Endless opportunity. The only change to be made is within.
For these gifts I give thanks. The trials and tribulations. Mistakes, flaws, judgement, misalignment, self ridicule, pain. The gray mass, dark nights. I give thanks.
I found my way. By making the way I feel my priority. I turned off the noise of the world, expectations, opinions that skewed my self opinion – and sat with myself. And listened to her voice. I learned what she wanted. What she REALLY wanted. I listened and now I move at her pace. Not the rhythm of the world, the rhythm of my world.
This feels like a journal entry but it was on my heart to share. You have to make yourself the priority. Life is long. It is complicated and consuming. If you’re not careful, you’ll lookup and not recognize the face looking back at you.
If you loose yourself…. just remember. You don’t have to DO anything. Just Be. Let the stillness and silence guide you.
Love….. ZaZa Ali.